The minute the doctor uttered the word “unfortunately”, Erica Morris said she knew her diagnosis was positive for breast cancer, but she said the only thoughts that came to her centered around her son (Johnathan Robert Thomas) and who would raise him; whether they would raise him the way she would; and if they would be good to him, expose him, love him, kiss him, and tell him they loved him.
She said she knows her mother would do all those things, but admits that is her job.
“I want to see him graduate from elementary [school], high school, college, get married and have children, so whatever I need to do to be here for it all, I am doing it – no matter what comes with it – depression, anger, despair, lowered self-esteem, not ever having a relationship or getting married. For my son, I was willing to risk it all.”
Morris, 47, who was diagnosed with stage one breast cancer, was given three options – a lumpectomy, during which they would remove the lump; or to remove the breast in which the lump was found – but with both options, there was a chance of the cancer returning. The third option given she said was to do a double mastectomy, chemotherapy and possibly radiation for the chances of it coming back at almost zero.
Morris opted to remove both breasts.
“I chose the latter [because] I wanted it done and over with. I also made that choice because I was informed that I had very dense breasts with a lot of calcifications, that would make it difficult to read results in the future.”
Before making her final decision, Morris said she sought a second opinion and the recommendation was the same.
Morris learnt she had breast cancer after her son accidentally grazed her and left her in excruciating pain.
“My son was lying on my lap trying to get comfortable and he grazed my nipple. I thought he had taken my nipple off. I checked inside my bra to make sure it was still there. The pain was excruciating.”
She said she initially brushed it off as a tenderness from menstruation cycle, until she realized she had already had her cycle for the month and the pain was just in one breast. She said it was a pain that lingered for days, and as a result, she knew something was wrong.
Morris said she reached out to a nurse friend, Nakia Smith, who examined her breast and noticed that it was inflamed underneath and encouraged her to have a mammogram and ultrasound done, even though she had one less than a year before.
After the ultrasound, Morris said it was recommended that she have a biopsy. Two weeks later, she received her result – it was cancerous.
Self-employed and without insurance, Morris knew that she would have a battle ahead of her with an “expensive disease” and would need at least $100,000 to cover surgery, treatment, tests and travel as she was told she would need treatments both at home and abroad.
Morris’ surgery is scheduled for June.
With no idea where the funds would come from, Morris’ friends stepped in and set up a GoFundMe account on May 2, to raise funds to assist Morris in her cancer fight.
As of Monday, $3,410 has been raised of the $150,000 goal.
“I really didn’t want a GoFundMe page,” said Morris, even though she does not know where the money would come from to pay for her medical needs. “The page was created the moment I told my friends, but I wouldn’t let them post it for two weeks. To be honest with you, I was embarrassed. I am the one that helps others – I am not supposed to ask for help. It was difficult for me to ask for help. Yes, I am a public person and my life is an open book, but I didn’t really want to share this.”
Morris is the person who in 2017 went on a prom date 28 years after being unceremoniously dumped by her best friend – with the goal in mind to use the outing as a marketing initiative to raise funds to assist their married St. Augustine’s College classmates of 1992, after the husband suffered a number of medical issues that left the family with mounting medical bills.
She did what she could to assist the family.
Four years ago, Morris told The Nassau Guardian: “You never know when it’s your time. She is my friend, and the minute I saw that she needed help, I just jumped on board. Anything that she needed. I can remember her calling me at 12 midnight because their car had broken down, saying ‘Erica, we don’t have any water in the house’, and me coming from my house at midnight in my pajamas, taking her to get some water. I can remember ‘man-sitting’ him – not babysitting – one day, because his wife needed to run some errands, so I told her I would watch him for her.”
After she informed her friends of her medical challenges, Morris, the founder of Legacy College Readiness and Tours, her college consulting business, which provides support to students and families throughout the college admissions process, then told her students.
“After that, she said people started reaching out to her telling her they would pray for her. She decided to reveal her battle on Facebook Live, because she did not want to constantly have to repeat what she was facing.” At the same token, her friends pressed her and insisted they open the GoFundMe account to help her defray the cost of her medical bills.
“I am grateful for them [friends], because they’ve been here from the start and have comforted and supported me as much as they can, and I am grateful for them all,” she said.
Morris has decided to have all treatments that she can have done at home, because her support system is here and she is comfortable with the doctors and their guidance. She also said she does not want to uproot her mother who will be the person taking care of her.
Always thinking of her son, she knows that whatever she is feeling, he is experiencing those feelings 10 times more and she wants him to be comforted seeing her.
“So, I will be doing some treatment and services abroad because of the cost as I will be paying for everything out of pocket, with no insurance.”
She does not know how many rounds of chemotherapy she will have to take. Whether she needs radiation will depend on whether the cancer spread to her lymph nodes.
And while she is focused on her double mastectomy, Morris said reconstruction is definitely a possibility in the future, but for now, she is focused on her healing.
Her breast cancer battle is compounded with lupus, which she was diagnosed with approximately six years ago.
Lupus is an autoimmune disease that occurs when a person’s immune system attacks their own tissues and organs. Inflammation caused by lupus can affect many different body systems, including a person’s joints, skin, kidneys, blood cells, brain, heart, and lungs.
Morris said her lupus is under control, but that the medication she takes for it, an immunosuppressant, poses a threat to her healing process from cancer and that she will have an increased chance of infection.
As she girds up to defeat cancer on top of lupus, Morris said she has questioned why her.
“I asked why me. I asked what did I do in my life so egregious that I have to fight both lupus and cancer. I literally started to go over my life to see if there was anything that I needed to atone for … anyone I needed to call and apologize to. I remember asking God if this battle isn’t mine, then why are you giving it to me, and asking him to just back up off of me just a little bit.”
The post Strength & courage in the face of adversity appeared first on The Nassau Guardian.
source https://thenassauguardian.com/strength-courage-in-the-face-of-adversity/
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